‘Twas the night before Meetup, when all through the house
Not a channel was active, not even #annouce;
Their suitcases were stacked by the front door with care,
In hopes that Matt Mullenweg soon would be there;
Automatticians are nestled all snug in their beds;
While visions of live townhalls danced in their heads;
And spouse in their ‘kerchief, and I wide awake,
Had just settled our brains for a short company meet,
When just in Slack there arose such a clatter,
Flash talks are due, circumstance doesn’t matter.
I sprang to my laptop to see the alert,
it came through #announcements, from Nick Momrik.
Tore open the notebooks with my notes,
Checked all the p2’s to check for talk votes,
Gave a lustre of what is to come,
When what to my wondering eyes did appear,
But a flash talk schedule with four tiny minutes.
With a short period of time, which runs out quick,
I knew in a moment, that I must bribe Nick.
More rapid than eagles those flash talks they came,
And he gonged, and shouted, and called out their names:
“Now @adamkheckler, now @danhauk! now @pesieminski and @bryanvillarin!
On, @corsonr! on, @seancull! on @donncha and @kraftbj!
To the edge of the earth! to the top of the Utah!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!
As leaves that before the wild GM meetup fly,
When they need to get there, they turn to the sky;
So up on the commercial airliners they fley
With a bag full of electronics, and a8c laptops too-
And then, in a twinkling, I hear on the PA
We’re almost to our destination, we’ll land safe this day.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
The wheels of our aircraft were just touching down.
The pilot was dressed in his uniform whites,
Just smiling and waving at the airport welcome site.
The plethora of passengers that he had brought here,
All were quite thankful and glad to breathe air.
Their shuttles, how they twinkled! Their excitement, how merry!
Their cheeks were like roses, their nose like a cherry!
Their driver who’s mouth was drawn up as a smile,
And the beard on his chin was close to half a mile;
The keys to the van held tight in his hand,
He promised to deliver us to Automattic land.
The journey involved crossing many ranges,
Our stomachs would shake like a bowl full of jelly.
The journey was rough, and up and down elevations,
And I laughed when I though of all the new relations.
A turn of the van into Park City,
Would soon result in an amazing party.
A shake of the hand, or a hug by a bear,
Soon gave me solace that we’re all really here.
Rose spoke not a word, but went straight to her work,
Handing out badges, and continuing to lurk.
And pointing a finger to the open bar,
And giving a nod, Matt Mullenweg mysteriously vanished,
Probably heading to his room, for activities managed.
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But how I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight-
“Happy GM to all, and to all a growth night!”